Adoptive mother seeks to spread message of the gift of family

By Rosemary Miller, Executive Director
Catholic Social Services of Montana

“Do you realize what our life would be like without children?” Chuck Grady said to his wife, Catherine, at their home in Great Falls shortly before he died. Family was his pride and joy.
Chuck and Catherine had married in the mid 1940s and had taken for granted, like most young married couples, that they would start a family right away. When a pregnancy did not happen they turned to Catherine’s father who was an attorney in Miles City and handled adoptions locally. Catherine's father often stated that “Everyone should have a family and a home.”
Pregnant unmarried women would go to the hospital in Miles City where they were offered board, room and prenatal care in return for working at the hospital. In the 1940s and early ’50s adoptions were most commonly done through a doctor and attorney. Chuck and Catherine adopted their son, Richard, in Miles City in the early 1950s.
Chuck and Catherine then moved to Townsend, where Chuck owned and operated a hardware store. One day Catherine noticed that Catholic Charities was opening an office in Helena. She told Chuck she was going to go and apply to adopt right away. They were one of the first families to apply to adopt after Catholic Charities opened its doors in 1954. They felt truly blessed by God when their daughter, Ann, joined their family.
The Gradys shared a deep value for family and found building their family through adoption to be a very special way to create a family. Catherine said that “Children bring real joy to your life.” She believes more couples should adopt children because of the true happiness children bring into your life.
Catherine’s daughter, Ann, went on to get married and also became an adoptive mother of two daughters through Catholic Social Services of Montana. Catherine was able to see how adoption has changed through the years and the evolution of open adoption. Information is shared more freely especially medical information.
Adoption had been such a private affair for a family. But for Catherine’s granddaughter, her neighbors gave her a party as a new adoptive grandmother. Catherine has been able to see the advantages of open adoption and societal changes in regards to adoption.
Her wish in sharing her story of adoption is to show people that adoption is possible. She would like to make it easier for couples to understand adoption. She realizes that struggles can happen in any family. Struggles in an adoptive family may have nothing to do with the adoption.
She would like for people today to know about the option of adoption. Catherine has an obvious wisdom brought by life experiences and she feels that some couples delay the decision to build their family through adoption simply out of fear. Catherine tries to eliminate the fears people have about adoption in hopes that couples will see the joy having children brings. Adoption has been wonderfully fulfilling for her and her husband. They loved being a family.

Published in The Montana Catholic, Vol. 22, No. 12, December 15, 2006.